Wednesday, November 22, 2017

The Factor

I was walking outside a mall last week, in Detroit.

It was dark, and I walked up behind a woman, then started to go around her.

I felt awkward. Sort of a small sidewalk, and I felt like I was passing a little close, particularly in the dark.

She turned, looked at me, and relaxed immediately.

Was it because I was a genial-looking old man? Hell, no. I'm not genial, and she didn't look at my face. Instead, she immediately looked at my left hand, which was carrying--an ICEE.

I had a sudden realization: the least threatening thing on earth is an ICEE.

Just create a mental image of anyone--scary government agent, vampire, axe murderer--and put an ICEE in their hand. Threat level: zero.

Use this knowledge wisely, and only for good.

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